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A mathematician, a physicist and a chemist* are in a room. At the centre of the room, is a beautiful woman. The scientist running the experiment explains the rules:
1. When you reach the woman, she's agreed to do whatever you want.
2. You can travel half the distance to the woman then you must stop
3. You can hen set off again, travelling half the remaining distance, then stopping.
4. Repeat step 3 as many times as needed.
The mathematician whips out a notebook and pencil, and exclaims "PAH! I can never reach the woman!" and leaves the room.
The physicist sets off, measuring the distance travelled at each iteration, and plots the points on a graph. After about 3 goes, he storms off saying it'll take an inifinite number of turns to reach the woman.
The chemist then happily set off, whistling a jaunty tune.
The chief experimenter asks why he isn't daunted, given the other two proved it would take infinite time to reach the woman.
"Simple", says the chemist " I believe I can get close enough for experimental purposes".
*Different variations of this joke appear depending on your allegience.
Alberto Brandolini: The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.
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I don't like it. I can't tell what relates to what after a few levels.
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It's called a BD* indentation routine.
* Brewer's Droop
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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I had a power outage this morning, that left my router bleeding to death...As I have wireless too I wanted to use it to connect the desktop, but there is no WiFi on it...So I took my phone, configured it as USB modem and connected to the PC! Now I can browse the web like old days, with the speed of a dial-up modem!
I love technology, for sure when it works...
I'm not questioning your powers of observation; I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is. (V)
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Remembering the days you desperately waited for the whole picture to load and thinking, "why does the picture not load from bottom up?" 
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![Badger | [badger,badger,badger,badger...]](https://codeproject.freetls.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/badger.gif)
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But what if you're not looking for pictures of bottoms? 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Hey, KSS remember? 
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911 msrbm gtg
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![Badger | [badger,badger,badger,badger...]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/badger.gif)
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Not talking black and white photography, I presume?
Life is too shor
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Sepia
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Well if it's black and white then it's art. Pron is in colour.
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Those color blind folks sure are classy. 
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Apple have suffered another major security breach, after millions of iTunes accounts around the world have been infected with the new U2 album.
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It was a bloodbath[^]
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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Not exactly free - more like pro Bono
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Hi,
I'm UKCIG-UK Capital Investments Group
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What a very small capital investments group.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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To be fair, Jerry did use capital letters in "UKCIG-UK".
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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Not any more you aren't...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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We have ban hammers. 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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I used the GTFO my screen developement tool to protect my Code, it's Freeware, so no Money for you 
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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So here I was working on VS and strutting my style...
Then out of the blue it just stops working all together. So I do what any good programmer does (After some uncensored words as I was in the process of saving after a few code changes)...
ALT-CTRL-DEL
Now task manager opens up and shows that VS is not responding. Ok... right click end task....
Guess what...
Task manager is not responding... 
So what to do???
ALT-CTRL-DEL
Now a second task manager opens up and shows that task manager is not responding. Ok... right click end task....
VS closes down automatically and I can continue like normal. 
Feels like using a windows emulator on a windows machine to run a program or is that just me?
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Throw your computer off of a high mountain. Take up knitting instead.
Our business is a dark and evil business. One that must not be pursued, I think. 
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