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I'd be interested to know what criteria people measure their social life by.
I spend more time during work hours chatting to people on MSN than co-workers. 3-4 weekends may go by in a row without meeting up with a single friend.
However, I am very happily married. Brend and I were friends before we were lovers, and have known each other since teenagers. Our relationship is based upon friendship and respect for each others opinions in conversation. For that reason we don't miss other company  In fact, weekends are generally spent trying to get away from other people - hiking, camping, etc.
So yes, the number of people in my social life may be "sparse", but I'm extremely satisfied with the company. I feel no lack. Thus, I voted that I have an excellent social life.
I am interested to hear what others think about this. Do I have my measurement of social happiness all wrong in your opinion?
Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
Meg's World - Blog
Photography
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No, you have it dead right. IMO. Quality over quantity. Intimacy over acquaintances.
regards,
Paul Watson
Bluegrass
South Africa
Chris Maunder wrote:
"I'd rather cover myself in honey and lie on an ant's nest than commit myself to it publicly."
Jon Sagara replied:
"I think we've all been in that situation before."
Crikey! ain't life grand?
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I don't know, I'm not married, but if you're hanging around the same person all the time, I imagine you'd eventually run out of stores to tell. Say the the average guy has about 50 good stores to tell, so that would last about a year, then it would be all repeats after that. Same goes for jokes.
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I don't agree with that. The stories of the "past" are even hard to run out of. I don't think you can tell someone every single thing you've ever done or would just for kicks. So perhaps yes the stories that are "high" on the list, stories that may not require any context to enjoy but there are other stories I'm sure that would come up.
For example you go to a place and something happens there that reminds you of something that happened a long time ago. I think you would always have those little stories. Also, it depends on your interests. It's not like life stops or anything, perhaps you talk about current events, things happened at work, something you saw on the way home, there's plenty of things especially if you have the same interests.
The same goes for the jokes, perhaps the jokes that don't need a context but if you're funny you usually don't stop being funny or come up with new material. The funniest jokes are usually those that have a context and may not be funny to a 3rd party. Something that happens while he's camping and he makes a joke. He didn't say he quit doing things, he just quit hanging out with other people and that's fine.
I'm not married either, but I can see if someone has found the right person that's how it could be for them. Everyone's different. I see your point too, but it's really a static point as if everything froze after he got married (And, I'm sure that can happen to people too  )
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That's why we keep doing interesting things, making interesting stories together to tell future generations
Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
Meg's World - Blog
Photography
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Yes, I would say anyone who has a husband/wife/significant other, you ought to be voting for "OK social life" or better. If you have a poor or no social life in this situation, what kind of a relationship is that???
"Fish and guests stink in three days." - Benjamin Franlkin
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Megan Forbes wrote:
So yes, the number of people in my social life may be "sparse", but I'm extremely satisfied with the company. I feel no lack.
Same here. I have one really good friend, and we do everything together. However, we aren't very good at "socialization". When we have to be around other people, we usually talk about programming, hacking, webdesign, and physics. Any other people within hearing range usually just shake their heads in pity, and ask themselves if my friend and I are speaking English.
Do I have a social life? Not really in the manner of many friends, but in the quality of friends, I would be nearly unsurpassed.
Aaron Eldreth
TheCollective4.com
My Articles
While much is too strange to be believed,
Nothing is too strange to have happened.
- T. Hardy
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Megan Forbes wrote:
Do I have my measurement of social happiness all wrong in your opinion?
Nope. Important thing is you enjoy it or not. So you are right. If you have one great person which you enjoy with him , that great for all of yyour life. . I really get happy when I read your post althought my social life sucks.
Mazy
"One who dives deep gets the pearls,the burning desire for realization brings the goal nearer." - Babuji
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Thanks Mazy
My social life has sucked at times - noticeably high school  . However, investing time and care in people usually pays off (unless there is something wrong with the person in question). I hope things improve for you . Out of interest, at what point would a guy in Iran think about getting married? (I always seem to be asking you questions... )
Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
Meg's World - Blog
Photography
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Megan Forbes wrote:
I hope things improve for you . Out of interest, at what point would a guy in Iran think about getting married? (I always seem to be asking you questions... )
Iran is a traditional country , so many people think they HAVE TO marriy because of what religion and tradition say and also because they shouldn't be alone for all of their life, but in developed part of country age of marriage get higher because of bad economical condition. Also again in developed parts , hemosexualy increased(because of many reasons) and marriage become less again(Marriage does not mean same sex mariage here). I myself one of people who belive in marriage and think everybody have a person which suite him/her in this world which should/can live with him/her all of his/her life. 
Mazy
"One who dives deep gets the pearls,the burning desire for realization brings the goal nearer." - Babuji
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Mazdak wrote:
I myself one of people who belive in marriage and think everybody have a person which suite him/her in this world which should/can live with him/her all of his/her life
Excellent philosophy!
As an aside, I've just noticed we share a birthday, although you seem to have survived 6 less of them than I have 
Look at the world about you and trust to your own convictions. - Ansel Adams
Meg's World - Blog
Photography
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Megan Forbes wrote:
Excellent philosophy!
Well , It doesn't still proof , at least for me  but I can imagine I'm still young.
Megan Forbes wrote:
As an aside, I've just noticed we share a birthda
Wowwwwww, what a great day is 21th of May.
Mazy
"One who dives deep gets the pearls,the burning desire for realization brings the goal nearer." - Babuji
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By social life i mean spendig time with my family and friends. Having diner at a nice restaurant with a good wine and a few friends, or going to cinema or theatre, someones birthday, stuff like that.
I don't think my social life is diferent from any of my friends who are not developers, or even involved with IT.
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Like Paul Watson, my social life might not fit the norm. I have a lot of special-interest friends/groups: CP people, gym friends, work friends, old friends from college who are flung across the country, etc. I don't, however, have a lot of general-purpose hanging-out friends, so while my weekdays are generally pretty packed, I don't always do much on the weekends.
"Fish and guests stink in three days." - Benjamin Franlkin
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Is it true that when people speak of "having a life", they generally refer to fast cars, good looking girls, cash...?
Norman Fung
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B'coz i fit and live as geek!.
Nothing in my life except for compo's.
One, Two, Three, Four.. Oops! i live in a
clustered environment with 30+! and doin
programming and testing. Anyway my only
outcry is and will be only on forums like
this!
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Yo fit into the geek's world. What is so bad about it?
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Get over this stereotyping about this geek=="cool" or "not cool". Just because we're technically competent doesn't mean we have to be socially/verbally/asthetically chanlleged to remain a "geek".
Norman Fung
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sure we don't have to be, but it comes naturally.
No matter how many times u take a dump, u can never accumulate more than your mother.
West African proverb(a favorite of my mother).
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Easy! Just sort codeproject members by number of articles and threads posted! :P
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Miguel Lopes wrote:
Just sort codeproject members by number of articles
Marc, the lone ranger...
Due to technical difficulties my previous signature, "I see dumb people" will be off until further notice. Too many people were thinking I was talking about them...
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Developer first requirement is to be a geek. And I am fit with that.
Sonork 100.41263:Anthony_Yio
Life is about experiencing ...
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You don't need to be a geek just because!
Norman Fung
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My Social Life (in the typical sense) is mostly poor now, but I intend to improve on it, and in 3 years or so hope to have an excellent social life.
Nish
p.s. Also helps that I am not really a geek - not half as much as the active CPians anyway. I consider myself to be a non-geek coder
Now with my own blog - void Nish(char* szBlog);
My MVP tips, tricks and essays web site - www.voidnish.com
Request - Could everyone who have in the past, posted on my personal forum on CP, be kind enough to delete all your posts please? I intend to start a personal non-technical blog there, now that it is RSSd and would very much like to empty the forum before I do so - because the posts that are there as of now are mostly test posts and posts that were made before we all knew it was a blog
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Why do you want to "improve" your social life, Nish?
regards,
Paul Watson
Bluegrass
South Africa
Chris Maunder wrote:
"I'd rather cover myself in honey and lie on an ant's nest than commit myself to it publicly."
Jon Sagara replied:
"I think we've all been in that situation before."
Crikey! ain't life grand?
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