|
Sander Rossel wrote: I recently read many Muslims drink alcohol.
And still there are many who do not.
What I meant was to only play it safe, until you know for sure they do. This is all assuming that the OP do not mind drinking themselves. 
|
|
|
|
|
Talking to people during breaks is a good place to start.
Keep it casual and do not get very personal. Ask them about the job they do etc.
|
|
|
|
|
I have always found the best way was to take a passive back seat for a couple of weeks before you do anything, except if you see someone wrestling with an issue you know how to solve (or have solved yourself) with me it was Serial Comms, Someone was battling with a RS485 device he had wired as a 422, offered advice showed him the wiring error he made, buddy for life. My theory is people at work are generally OK, but they have their own way of doing stuff for a reason, until you know the reason keep your opinion to yourself. Plus you don't want to be the bosom buddy of the office jerk!  been there!
|
|
|
|
|
Bring some snacks for a first month anniversary and bring them to your colleagues.
(Especially as you have a different background you can introduce them to some new food stuff?)
|
|
|
|
|
I'm quiet and introverted as well, although I can be a bit more outgoing at work.
What works for me is to just listen in on conversations and just mingle as soon as I get a chance.
Like last week, two people I didn't know yet talked about buying a new monitor and backing up to OneDrive.
I bought two new monitors last year so I just chimed in and said "I can really recommend..., I bought two last year and they work great and the price is good for the quality you get."
From there the conversation went to OneDrive, which I also planned to use.
Other times, like when the conversation is about sports, I just keep quiet, unless people ask me if I'm into sports, at which point I answer them I'm completely totally not into sports.
What may help too is arriving at the office and just starting a random conversation by just throwing something out there... "Commute today was crazy, there was this guy who..." or "Who saw that documentary on TV last night?"
Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but people will know who you are and they'll be more inclined to start a conversation with you.
Another good strategy is just standing up at around lunch time and asking, in general, "So who's going out to lunch?"
Maybe it's no one, maybe you make some new friends.
Good luck with your new job and with making some friends! 
|
|
|
|
|
When all else fails, take hostages
When I was growin' up, I was the smartest kid I knew. Maybe that was just because I didn't know that many kids. All I know is now I feel the opposite.
|
|
|
|
|
And put them in that cauldron 
|
|
|
|
|
Just don't try to impress anyone at the beginning. For a while just be an interested listener asking questions about what they say, showing them you respect their opinion and want to know more about them. Don't overtake conversations and wait patient until they ask you. That should be easier for you, than starting any kind of conversation if you are not enough confident yet.
After some time, you will (hopefully) be at least 90% sure, who is worth to hear / interact with and who is just telling BS and better to be avoided. Which already is a very useful information.
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
modified 15-Nov-19 6:13am.
|
|
|
|
|
"listen"
always good advice!
+1
When I was growin' up, I was the smartest kid I knew. Maybe that was just because I didn't know that many kids. All I know is now I feel the opposite.
|
|
|
|
|
When I first get to a job, I observe others. I try to find out who is congregating with whom, and I also look at company calendars for employee events.
When I first get somewhere, I'll sign on to some of the events, like an employee pot luck or beer and pizza fridays or whatever if they're available - any sort of social event where mingling with other employees is expected. That takes some of the pressure off of approaching people.
Otherwise, I just sniff people out. Usually, I'm on a team with others, and I start there. Get into likes and dislikes. Ask people what music they like to code to, that sort of thing.
Also, if a boss sees you "fitting in", they're less likely to single you out.
When I was growin' up, I was the smartest kid I knew. Maybe that was just because I didn't know that many kids. All I know is now I feel the opposite.
|
|
|
|
|
Some offices do have a buddy system, where your buddy will make you easily acclimatise to the new surroundings. In fact, I was a buddy for a new employee, and helped him around the office.
With a boss, the best thing is to set the expectations straight in the beginning itself - like 'Can you please specify what all is expected out of me', or 'Can you please specify how I can contribute more to the office in the short and long terms'.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Member 14169933 wrote: my boss thinks that I am just sitting around
- Do you have tasks assigned to you (bug fix, maintenance, new code, doc like specs and requirements...) ? If no, go see your boss for things to do.
- Are you progressing on those tasks, Do you keep time in an official manner (online , offline) ? so you have issue trackers (for example, jira)
- Are you reporting your progress to anyone, have you shown your boss what you do ? do you commit code, do you demo what you are working on ?
I'd rather be phishing!
|
|
|
|
|
Maybe I port mono for campaign (9)
"We can't stop here - this is bat country" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
|
|
|
|
|
Go on then, I'll throw in the solution.
'Tis promotion.
|
|
|
|
|
Good man
"We can't stop here - this is bat country" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
|
|
|
|
|
Congratulations to all involved: 19 years (I think) and still going strong!
Next year ... that'll be some celebration ... 
Keep it up chaps and chapesses: you are all doing a great job , and we'd have nothing to do but work if it wasn't for you all. 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
OriginalGriff wrote: 19 years
I've been here since almost the beginning - Time flies !
|
|
|
|
|
|
OriginalGriff wrote: we'd have nothing to do but work if it wasn't for you all.
I'll hoist a ![Beer | [beer]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/beer.gif) to the second-best way of avoiding what our grandparents called "honest work"!
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
|
|
|
|
|
Daniel Pfeffer wrote: to the second-best way of avoiding what our grandparents called "honest work"!
I now am curious... which is the 1st one for you?
M.D.V.
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
|
|
|
|
|
For me, it would be writing (code, specifications, etc.).
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
|
|
|
|
|
I thought that would be consider part of the "honest work"
Another thing is to say, they are "meaningful work"
M.D.V.
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
|
|
|
|
|
"Honest work" was the kind of work that got you sweaty and dirty. Farming or digging ditches was honest work. Office work was looked upon with suspicion.
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
|
|
|
|
|
Quote: Next year
Yeah, if you mean 20 in 2020, then yeah that's one milestone. It's been great 5 years knowing you too!
Cheers and ![Java | [Coffee]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/coffee.gif) !
The sh*t I complain about
It's like there ain't a cloud in the sky and it's raining out - Eminem
~! Firewall !~
|
|
|
|
General 
News 
Suggestion 
Question 
Bug 
Answer 
Joke 
Praise 
Rant 
Admin 
Submit an article or tip
![Good Stuff | [The good stuff]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/vegemite.gif)
on me.