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Bergholt Stuttley Johnson wrote: how on earth do you ground the cat?
You hide the car keys on Saturday, obviously.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Ground the cat...ie, make sure the cat stays on the floor 
73
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Sounds like another case for defenestration.
Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.
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I sometimes blame everything that goes wrong in my life on one of my four cats. I am convinced that this one particular cat actually wants me dead, so blaming her for everything is not an issue.
Wife thinks I didn't do the dishes, but in fact, the cat dirtied them during the night and put them back into the sink. Come on, it's a no-brainer. 
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rubbish, you expect us to believe that a cat would do such a thing!
that's far too much effort (trying to kill you however is perfectly believable)
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Cats are evil SOB's. Even the daughters.
veni bibi saltavi
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On the other hand, they're not that bright (which is just as well!)
Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.
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My cat has no interest in scent marking the computer case or treading on the keyboard whilst I'm out of the room. What he does, though, is have an overwhelming need to chew wires. USB, optical, audio, you name it. Anything that will annoy me intensely and that doesn't carry enough current to kill.
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Coat the wires with Tabasco sauce, he'll learn.
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I always make sure the cat's properly grounded, connected by several feet of heavy chain. River bottoms make the best grounds, but a deep lake will do in a pinch.
Will Rogers never met me.
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A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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so which one is Leslie Nielsen?
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Both
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Seems like this joke is commin round a lot ... 
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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It does float about.
Mongo: Mongo only pawn... in game of life.
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At an interview, a programmer is asked what he would do if the microwave would catch fire. He says he would throw it out the window. Baffled, the interviewer asks "okay, what if the coffee brewer catches fire?" And the programmer replies "Put it in the microwave and throw it out the window, as we already have a solution for that problem."
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Oso Oluwafemi Ebenezer wrote: coffee brewer catches fire?
Oso Oluwafemi Ebenezer wrote: and throw it out the window
you can not throw ![Java | [Coffee]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/coffee.gif) out the window!
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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You can throw burnt coffee out the window.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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You can if your language's "object" definition supports IDefenestratable - most real world modelling systems do 
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A 5 for knowing what defenestration means. 
I presume you've read this[^] 
Will Rogers never met me.
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In a twisted sort of way, that shows exactly what is wrong with coders these days... 
Hey, I have a hammer! Every problem is a nail!
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Yes, everybody knows that if the microwaver burns, you simply buy a new one.
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Well that, and the interviewer never said they got a new microwave... so how can you put the coffee maker in it to throw it out the window?
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