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Easy... tell them it's chocolate! 
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Having pets is one thing, but you need to acknowledge that the cats have you as their pet and servant.
CQ de W5ALT
Walt Fair, Jr., P. E.
Comport Computing
Specializing in Technical Engineering Software
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It could be worse: you could have children around... 
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OriginalGriff wrote: Anyone know how to get a cat to wipe it's damn feet?
My cat never makes a mess. Then again, my cat does not exist. No self-respecting man owns a cat. 
Everyone is born right handed. Only the strongest overcome it.
Fight for left-handed rights and hand equality.
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011111100010 wrote: No self-respecting man owns a cat.
Well, I have 4 cats, and 2 dogs (Jumangi at its finest).
I will mail you my man card in the next couple of days.
-- rants are the vehicle of the lazy and uninspired - JSOP 2/2018
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George Clooney has a cat. So does Morrisey, Ewan McGregor, David Bowie had cats, Morgan Freeman has a cat, Leonard Nimoy, Vincent Price, OriginalGriff, Sander Rossel, ... the list goes on. All cat owners.
And ... there is even research that says that men who own one or two cats are more attractive to the ladies: Why Women Like Men Who Love Cats | petMD[^]
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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OriginalGriff wrote: George Clooney has a cat. So does Morrisey, Ewan McGregor, David Bowie had cats
You make my case for me. 
OriginalGriff wrote: more attractive to the ladies
If you need a cat to be attractive to the ladies, my point stands.
Everyone is born right handed. Only the strongest overcome it.
Fight for left-handed rights and hand equality.
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Whatb you mean to say is that all are tolerated by cats as long as they do their bidding.
CQ de W5ALT
Walt Fair, Jr., P. E.
Comport Computing
Specializing in Technical Engineering Software
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Don't forget Hellboy and Data, they have cats too.
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People don't own cats. Cats own people... 
Days spent at sea are not deducted from one's alloted span - Phoenician proverb
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Indeed!
Everyone is born right handed. Only the strongest overcome it.
Fight for left-handed rights and hand equality.
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so very true.
-- rants are the vehicle of the lazy and uninspired - JSOP 2/2018
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011111100010 wrote: No self-respecting man owns a cat.
If your self-respect would be diminished by owning(*) a cat, then you're the one with the issues, laddy.
(*) BTW, cats are not 'owned' by human beings. Cats have clients.
Software Zen: delete this;
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You take things way too f***ing serious. 
-- rants are the vehicle of the lazy and uninspired - JSOP 2/2018
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Build a box around the printer? Stop the pet from being able to get at the printer?
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Don't tempt me - I'm inclined to build a box around the cat ...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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The 'managed' cat.
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He'd be happily managed by Professor Schrödinger at 03:00 most mornings when he decides it's breakfast time ... or possibly Cruella de Vil if I can persuade him to bark.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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OriginalGriff wrote: 03:00 most mornings
It could be worse. My two greyhounds occasionally decide around 3:00-4:00 a.m. that it's breakfast time. This is announced by the pitter-patter of dog toenails on the hardwood floor, followed by the jangle of the tags on their collars. If that doesn't work, Hera (the female) will bark(*), which ends up with me looking like this[^].
(*) The male is Bacchus, the god of whine. I've only heard him bark once in the year and a half we've had him.
Software Zen: delete this;
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Barking I could probably life with.
It's standing with one set of paws on my bladder and the other on my Gentleman's Vegetables and seemingly bouncing up and down that gets me every time... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Fortunately mine don't do that. Other than the barking, the worst mine do is stick their cold nose in my face.
Software Zen: delete this;
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Terry Pratchett wrote: It's like having a small piece of defrosting liver pressed lovingly against you.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Very apt description. Given their height and the fact that their snout can be 6" long or more, they can reach almost anything with it.
Software Zen: delete this;
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I know your frustration, all too well. 
-- rants are the vehicle of the lazy and uninspired - JSOP 2/2018
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It's the old VB v C# debate, you should've gone with dogs.
veni bibi saltavi
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