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I wish I was...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Dunno if this is more or less appalling, but if you text my Mom she'll eventually (potentially weeks later when she needs to place/receive a call and finally turns her phone on and sees the notification) call you back (quite possibly on the landline) and remind you that she doesn't know how to read texts on her phone and has no idea what you tried sending her.  
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, weighing all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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One of the good things about mobiles is that there are iphones and androids,
as the IT guy visiting various clients occasionally asked "how do I do X on my phone" and an android thrust at me, my answer "sorry, I'm an iphone guy," and of course visa-versa.
Next best plan, point at some young person in sight thumbing away on their phone, "that guy/gal is an expert." (And often as not they are - esp compared to my phone abilities.)
Can't be bothered learning, me old eyes having trouble seeing the tiny text on the tiny screens... already grumpy enough - prefer to age gracefully, not digitally.
Installing Signature...
Do not switch off your computer.
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Lopatir wrote: One of the good things about mobiles is that there are iphones and androids,
Did you forget one? As one of the last WP users, I don't have to answer any mobile questions period! It's also a great reason why I can't 'facetime' the rest of the family! 
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
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kmoorevs wrote: Lopatir wrote: One of the good things about mobiles is that there are iphones and androids,
Did you forget one? As one of the last WP users
microsoft forgot it before I did
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Same I do 
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OriginalGriff wrote: grabs a passing teenager
I tried that, it took me 6 hours to talk my way out of the police station.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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OriginalGriff wrote: Every time Herself wants to send a text, she grabs a passing teenager, and gets them to type it into her phone for her ...
At least you are off the hook.
I'm retired. There's a nap for that...
- Harvey
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Quote: he grabs a passing teenager, and gets them to type it into her phone for her
Are you sure that's the actual purpose? 
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That's what she tells me, and I'm not going to start disbelieving my wife!
(It gets painful when I do that.)
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Good one
Someone's therapist knows all about you!
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By only possessing an app-free flip-phone, whenever asked for help on these hand-held hellions I point out that I don't know how to because my phone doesn't do that.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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And how often are you tempted to flip it open and say 'Beam me up, there is no intelligent life here'? 
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
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That can't be a new tweet, or else he's recycling his own. I've seen this 10+ years ago, and also remember it was attributed to him.
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No, I'm sure it isn't a new tweet. I'm late to the game...again. 
But, it is still funny.
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Quote: No, I'm sure it isn't a new tweet.
My inner engineering nerd is raising a red flag.
The tweet IS new. The content is recycled!
Cheers,
Mike Fidler
"I intend to live forever - so far, so good." Steven Wright
"I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met." Also Steven Wright
"I'm addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn't matter." Steven Wright yet again.
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LOL I can feel my nerd-power surging!
Cheers,
Mike Fidler
"I intend to live forever - so far, so good." Steven Wright
"I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met." Also Steven Wright
"I'm addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn't matter." Steven Wright yet again.
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They are not even called phones, cell phones or even mobile phones nowadays - they are now called mobile devices. They are tiny, very powerful for their size, computers that just so happen to have the ability to make phone calls.
“That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”
― Christopher Hitchens
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GuyThiebaut wrote: They are not even called phones, cell phones or even mobile phones nowadays - they are now called mobile devices. They are tiny, very powerful for their size, computers that just so happen to have the ability to make phone calls.
I have forwarded your message to Mr. Stroustrup.
He is working on revoking all your access -- to everything. 
Oh, he can do it. Everything underneath the Internet is built on C++. 
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Right. And apparently some manufacturers consider such ablility almost irrelevant.
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Are Tourists in Cuba usually Havana good time?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Did you just Castro that one out there to see if anyone would bite?
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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not that bad, give that man a cigar
Installing Signature...
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