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That's it! I finally put my finger on it now!
You are a kindred spirit to Douglas Adams, are you not?! 
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Knock, Knock!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Go away, I've had enough of you Jehovah's witnesses already! 
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But don't you want to know what he's accused of?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Eternal damnation in hell for not handing out enough Watchtowers?
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Those guys dont believe in hell.. I was born and was there for about 16yrs before i pulled out
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16 years in Hell? I didn't know you had worked for McDonald's?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I never know what it is they do and don't.
They're open minded about gay marriage and sex before marriage (or so I heard), but they don't celebrate birthdays because that's glorification of a person and only God may be glorified (or some such).
Only Jehovah's witnesses are more open minded about sex than about birthdays.
Although a friend told me about a colleague who was a Jehovah's witness and brought cake to celebrate her cats birthday... (never her own, but of course a cat is not a person).
And then they have to spread the word[^].
I've also heard they're kind of cultish in that you cannot leave or they'll never speak to you again (including family) and anyone who does is kicked out.
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Yes its true.
No birthday
No prayers
No xmas
No new year
No Thanksgiving to God even for keeping them through the year
No engagement in sports
No relationship with outsiders (we all unbelievers)
Yes to alcohol
Yes to bf/gf relationship
Yes to segregation
They are blinded. I've been there and I know the differences...practically
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Why? They are so much fun.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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Some are, but they always come at the worst times.
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OriginalGriff wrote: Knock, Knock!
02:15, enough drinking for tonight, off for a shower and then bed.
Michael Martin
Australia
"I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible."
- Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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Glad to hear you do shower !
cheers, Bill
«There is a spectrum, from "clearly desirable behaviour," to "possibly dodgy behavior that still makes some sense," to "clearly undesirable behavior." We try to make the latter into warnings or, better, errors. But stuff that is in the middle category you don’t want to restrict unless there is a clear way to work around it.» Eric Lippert, May 14, 2008
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I did warn you not to play with that drill.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Who's there?
Will Rogers never met me.
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Hatch
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Gesundheit.
Knock knock...
Will Rogers never met me.
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Who's there?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Albany
Will Rogers never met me.
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*what have I started?*
Albany who?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Albany rabbits have fluffy white tails.
Don't blame me - you started it.
Will Rogers never met me.
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Roger Wright wrote: Don't blame me - you started it
I was bored! 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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And I can't play ESO (Elder Scroll Online) because, server update! 
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I'm sure you've seen this before or remember doing it yourself as a newbie. An assignment say something like "divide the array of bytes into groups of 4 bytes, then XOR all the groups" and the student thinks that means they have to make an byte[][] to hold thousands of tine 4-byte arrays, which is completely pointless but "the assignment said to do it". Or when explaining Huffman codes or such a "bitstring" is mentioned and the student thinks that means they should use a string to hold a bunch of "0" and "1" characters. Or the assignment says to translate a for-loop into assembly and they implement it in the most general and naive way even though it was just a "repeat 8 times"-kind of loop which has a much simpler implementation but they thought they wouldn't be allowed to use that because it's "not what the code says".
I'm not sure what to do about this. I've told a bunch of them that it's basically OK as long as it does the end result is the same, and that they should really just use a simple and/or efficient way to implement it. They're struggling with this whole "how you talk about what you're doing abstractly isn't literally how you code it up" thing though.
So, any ideas? How do I get this across properly?
inb4 "just make the assignment literal"; that's not how it will ever work in their careers. Besides, it complicates and spoils the assignment with the kind of implementation details that they should come up with.
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Isn't that the question every customer asks about their IT-staff?
Bastard Programmer from Hell 
If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]
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