|
Have you seen Q&A?
It's nicest effect is to generate incontinence... 
|
|
|
|
|
My add says "Splunk! What can you do with Splunk?"
To be honest, I'm not sure I want to know what that is and what I can do with it! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
|
|
|
|
|
I've been using Splunk for about a fortnight.
It's very good.
Although they still haven't fixed the typo for Splunk Mint[^] that I told them about (scroll down).
Perhaps the worst of their products to make the mistake on.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
|
|
|
|
|
The hamsters try hard, but sometimes they slip through.
If you get inappropriate ads, let Chris know and he'll do something about it.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
|
|
|
|
|
You must have posted code samples.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
|
|
|
|
|
Even Google can't get it right all the time.
A few years ago when I was reading a reply to one of my posts from Nish in my browser, gmail gave me an ad for an Indian Arranged Marriage site. 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
|
|
|
|
|
|
Must be one of the mailmen who I recently told what I think about their service.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
|
|
|
|
|
At least, he didn't go postal!
|
|
|
|
|
He was just doing his job. He is a postal worker after all.
It is good to see that the no fly zone around the capitol building is still secure. 
Once you lose your pride the rest is easy.
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
|
|
|
|
|
bwahaha, brilliant!
And a typical american reaction to boot, the reaction is quiete extravagant i think as a foreigner
Life's like a nose, you've got to get out of it whats in it!
|
|
|
|
|
Since they won't give him his gyrocopter back, can I have it?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
|
|
|
|
|
I heard about this on the radio and I thought they said it was a helicopter. Everyone's wondering how in the world did he do this without getting shot down. Now I see why. He was basically flying a kite, no wonder no one picked up on it earlier. 
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
|
|
|
|
|
I understand that updates are necessary but aggravating nonetheless! Multiply by the number of workstations/servers/VMs that you work on and you know what I mean...for me at this moment it's around 6-7.
It wouldn't be so bad, but I seem to notice a pattern (at least on my primary development system) where if updates are waiting to be installed, the performance gets sketchy...as if to force me to go ahead and restart even when I don't want to! 
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
|
|
|
|
|
Uninstall Adobe, that should save you a couple of updates a day for every machine 
|
|
|
|
|
How true!  I haven't even gotten to those yet!
Edit: But since you brought it up, do we have any geniuses in here from Adobe? If so, can you please explain why I have to constantly deny their 'suggestions' regarding the crapware and how to handle future updates? If you are saving the setting, (at least for update handling) can you at least set it correctly so that I don't have to!
"Go forth into the source" - Neal Morse
|
|
|
|
|
I set up WSUS in a VM last month, and have let it do its own thing since. Yesterday was the first time I watched it go through Patch Tuesday. Seeing all my machines download 200+ MB worth of updates (each) at LAN speed, rather than DSL speed (5mbps), was quite satisfying.
That doesn't do anything for third-parties, but I still call it a good start...
FWIW, I have about 6 physical machines, and maybe 20 VMs. In terms of saved bandwidth, it adds up.
|
|
|
|
|
kmoorevs wrote: I understand that updates are necessary but aggravating nonetheless!
Only aggravating when "there's an app for that".
<rant>
I believe sometime last century it was realized that writing platform specific applications was going to be an impossible task with the proliferation of devices available for presentation.
I believe one of our more vocal members recently expressed circumspection about web development.
Then again it is the dinosaurs that make policy and cannot get out of the rut in which they find themselves.
</rant>
Once you lose your pride the rest is easy.
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
|
|
|
|
|
So we programmers aren't known for our good estimates.
"How long will it take?"
"A few hours"
*Couple of days later*
"Just a few more hours"
Well, I guess you all know how it goes.
My gardener did a great job too...
I asked him to do my garden and then I asked an estimate for the costs.
I just got an actual price indication and it's more than two times as high as his estimate!
We're talking thousands of euro's here and his estimate is thousands off!
Oh yeah, I got it a month after he said I'd have it too.
It's particularly bad since he did more gardens in this neighborhood and all gardens are more or less the same size...
Perhaps he should take a job in IT?
Anyway, no way I'm paying that much for a simple garden 
|
|
|
|
|
Sander Rossel wrote: So we programmers aren't known for our good estimates.
That is why they are called 'estimate' and not 'predictions'. Now, personally, I would not want to estimate on the amount of time it takes to shoot a bear.
Sander Rossel wrote: It's particularly bad since he did more gardens in this neighborhood and all
gardens are more or less the same size...
"You did six forms in two days last time, why does it take so long to build SkyNet in a single form?"
Sander Rossel wrote: We're talking thousands of euro's here and his estimate is thousands off!
Where is this garden of yours, and what did you want done?
Heck, I can piss on some flowers and I bet I can sell the weed here on the market
Bastard Programmer from Hell 
If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]
|
|
|
|
|
Eddy Vluggen wrote: Where is this garden of yours, and what did you want done?
Actually my 'garden' is nothing more than a big pool of mud at the moment
So I was thinking a little path to the back, some grass, a fence, nothing to fancy...
It's about 5,5m wide and 14m deep.
And I'm guessing a garden, especially a simple one, has a lot less variables as software. Especially when you know the area.
So a cost estimate should be pretty spot on.
|
|
|
|
|
The cost is not in the size of the canvas, but rather the controls on it. Grass is a good filler, and there's probably a cheaper fence.
What is the time-frame agreed upon? How much would it cost, measured in FTE's?
Bastard Programmer from Hell
If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]
|
|
|
|
|
Sander Rossel wrote: we programmers aren't known for our good estimates
Good estimates usually cause management to cut them so that there is no chance of getting the task completed in time.
I remember, many years ago, a manager asked for an estimate for three modules and I said two weeks. They were small modules.
He said that was unacceptable and that I should have them finished in a week.
I said why not make it three days because they are not going to be functional in that time frame anyway.
He got the point and gave me two weeks.
Once you lose your pride the rest is easy.
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
|
|
|
|
|
tried the same thing once, but ended up having to do it in 2 days instead of one week, manager wasn't very competent 
Life's like a nose, you've got to get out of it whats in it!
|
|
|
|
|
Stefto wrote: tried the same thing once, but ended up having to do it in 2 days instead of one week
Well then I just would have told him after 2 days that it wasn't finished and that it would take another 3 days.
I always send an email stating what was said which would have read that I need a week and there is no way that I can get it complete in 2 days like he wants.
If he insists that it can be done in 2 days then he should assign it to someone else because I will need a week.
Stefto wrote: manager wasn't very competent
Either was this fellow, but if you give in and work extraordinary hours to get it done in 2 days he will want you to do it all the time.
On a day by day basis I would tell him I have a doctors appointment, a dentist appointment, have to take my Mom to the doctor the next day, etc., so I can not stay after normal business hours that day.
Never would I be pressured to work extraordinary hours for an incompetent estimate that is less than what I need to do the job.
Once you lose your pride the rest is easy.
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
|
|
|
|
General 
News 
Suggestion 
Question 
Bug 
Answer 
Joke 
Praise 
Rant 
Admin 
Submit an article or tip
