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Member 9082365 wrote: Meat is hung, criminals are hanged!
I suppose that depends on whether they are hanged before they are quartered, or quartered before they are hung 
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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Chris Maunder wrote: These guys are managing my money
Fortunately the guys that are actually managing your money aren't the ones managing their web site.
But I see what you're saying.
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Yeah, the guys actually managing your money are far more professional, trustworthy and reliable...
www.davidmkelly.net
Character-based SF and more...
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My car insurance provider has a "recover password" function. Since my dad registered me without my knowledge (yes, sometimes I hate him) I didn't knew my password and he, obviously, forgot it.
Ok, so "recover password". They sent me the password. In cleartext. To my e-mail.
But it's not over: the password was wrong. Why? In between the year they decided that password wouldn't allow special characters, and since I educated my father well he used "$" in the password. It's even an ASCII character for dog's sake!
I had to phone them, circumvent the 16.384 layers of phone services by calling to the legal branch, threaten the poor fellow of Hell and damnation and public lynching in order to have my account deactivated and join again with the same insurance number.
Geek code v 3.12
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- r++>+++ y+++*
Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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A friends mother (he's technically illiterate, so I get to help her with computer problems) had a fun one with her ISP: they changed the rules on passwords, so when she changed computers and we had to re-enter them all, the old password was too short to be entered. And also too short to be entered in the "confirm existing password" box of the "change password" page... 
Dealing with script-heads on a different continent to try and fix it was not fun...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Been there done that.
Sometimes I wish I was technically illiterate, at least I would't understand the idiocy behind these things...
Geek code v 3.12
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- r++>+++ y+++*
Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Chris Maunder wrote: These guys are managing my money
You have a warped idea of what these bankers actually do.
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My understanding is they take my money, invest it poorly, charge me for putting the money in, taking the money out, looking at my money, looking at the statements that set out what they've done with my money, and also charge me when I don't put enough money in.
Was there something I missed? An extra service I should sign up for so I can give them more money?
cheers
Chris Maunder
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You could ask Christian Graus - he probably met a couple of other ones! 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Chris Maunder wrote: looking at the statements that set out what they've you've done with your money, and also charge me when I don't put enough money in I use my own money
I actually had the impression that Canadian banks were sensible? Guess not
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This is an Australian bank.
cheers
Chris Maunder
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You poor poor man
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But Canadian banks are nothing to write home about (at least without avoiding expletives).
Having moved from the UK to Canada, I couldn't believe how bad they were. There have been some minor improvements with a couple of retailers getting in on the act, but as competition is pretty much strangled they're still pretty @!$$-poor.
Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.
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Chris Maunder wrote: This is an Australian bank.
So CommBank it is.
Michael Martin
Australia
"I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible."
- Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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That explains everything. Having visited Australia many times to see my grandkids, I have learnt that, because of their total isolation at the bottom of the world, they're still struggling to catch up with the rest of the world. And based on my dealings with my Kiwi son-in-law, it would appear that New Zealand is probably even worse.
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World Banks tend to use New Zealand as a test ground for services so is often messed with a lot
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xiecsuk wrote: because of their total isolation at the bottom of the world, they're still struggling to catch up with the rest of the world
Now if you look at a map of the world, and understand that North and South are aritrary, and then turn the map upside-down, then us Australians can make all sorts of comments about you brits on the bottom of the world.
cheers
Chris Maunder
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But it is still isolated, and out of the mainstream. Whereas Britain is the centre of the universe. It always has been. It is where everything of significance originated back in the 19th century before spreading out to the rest of the world. It just takes so long for news to get to the Antipodes. For instance, one day they will learn that 40Kph on a three-lane dual carriageway is equivalent to a man with a red flag walking in front of the car.
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Excuse me! I'll have you know we have telegraphs and running hot and cold water. While riding my velocipede the past week I even saw one of those new motorized carriage things chuffing down the street.
cheers
Chris Maunder
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You also have
1) superb, dirt cheap public transport
2) some incredible scenery
3) the best cinema seats I've sat in
4) the most resilient people I've ever met - Marysville Vic after the fire
5) the hottest weather I've been in - 47.6 degC
6) the best 4-day hospital stay I've had - snapped Achilles tendon
I love the place.
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Chris Maunder wrote: An extra service I should sign up for so I can give them more money
Oh sure, you could be a total idiot and ask them for financial advice! I tried that once, purely for amusement purposes, some teenager then tried to sell me every insurance product in their portfolio, he was almost in tears when we left without committing to anything.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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I've got a very sturdy mattress you can hide it under for nothing! Well nothing plus a little commission, obviously!
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Chris Maunder wrote: to basic speed and performance.
Chris, I have never experienced basic speed or performance with this site, but I still love the site. Love is blind I guess. 
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Slacker007 wrote: Chris, I have never experienced basic speed or performance with this site
Really? What sort of page load times are you seeing?
cheers
Chris Maunder
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