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I'll wait for the novel...or the movie, whichever comes first. But I think the movie's already been done. I have a red stapler, is that a bad thing?
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Do you work with me by any chance? 
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I always want to throw up when I hear words like "agile", "sprint", "scrum", "burndown", "waterfall" and all the other trendy management buzzwords. Because it really means it's the currently fashionable form of crippling clusterf***. I'm glad I rarely have to work at places that do that. I prefer to work on projects by creating and following a list of tasks as well as possible, modifying them if necessary, keeping management and others who are affected apprised with quick status updates when there's anything worth reporting, and being trusted (through experience) to finish whatever needs doing in a reasonable amount of time, and having the finished application do what it's supposed to. And all the while communicating in real English words.
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Ignore RyanDev.
Listen to the other doctors who concur.
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I'm retired, and as such, I can, from experience, confidently say that "work sucks." Its near-universal. Only the degree of suck changes. Your particular suck that would have me thinking suicide was the nights and weekends suck. I don't do that well. My only truly good job was a volunteer thing with the Army in Iraq, where we DID do the nights and weekends thing but I knew that going in and there wasn't anything else to do anyway. I'm retired and loving it, and your major thrust in life should be saving large amounts of $$$$ to buy an annuity with that can never ever be exhausted, and retire as early and possible. Right now, I'm contemplating renewing an old hobby since another one seems to be ending, and that is ham radio. Did the November SSB Sweepstakes last weekend, and could become a contester, dunno. But retirement is where its at, the sooner the better and the more inexhaustible supplies of money the better. I've an actual pension that's not going away (I worked for the Navy (not _in_ the Navy, but a civilian engineer)) an annuity from a large insurance company, and a little SS. The next antenna (its like boating - you always need a bigger boat... or antenna) is $7K, top of the line, on a telescoping fold-over tower that is $17K. If my other expensive hobby, road rallying, dies as expected, the savings from that will likely actually allow me to achieve that antenna / tower combination. But find something you can endure and then get the H out of it and retired at the earliest possibility.
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Been there, done that. $635 for 5 minute visit by cardiac specialist was straw that broke the camel's back. I quit the scene 30 years ago and slipped into the consulting stream making sure supplier and client are talking to each other. Granted, finding $30M projects is a little more difficult these days.
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"Good. Quick. Cheap. Pick any two."
That is woven into the very fabric of reality. If we ever get a Theory of Everything, it will predict that.
Another fundamental feature of the universe is that "management is constitutionally incapable of accepting the last three words." (The ToE will predict that also.)
And finally, the last law of the universe is, "programmers are spineless enablers who cannot say 'no,' no matter how insane the situation. They just say yes until they leave, are fired, end up in the psych-ward, or die."
Now if you'll excuse me, Nurse Ratched is here with my meds.....
Cheers,
Mike Fidler
"I intend to live forever - so far, so good." Steven Wright
"I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met." Also Steven Wright
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Just got an email from SourceForge talking about Firesheep Wi-Fi attach. 
Sorry I will get my coat. 
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Corporal Agarn wrote: Firesheep
That makes me think of the Goodies, not Griff.
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Sheepie, sheepie, yum yummmm.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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what's the deal with the sheeps? 
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Nelek wrote: what's the deal with the sheeps?
Four Fuuccks Sake, sheep is singular and plural, there is no such thing as sheeps. It's not that hard.
Michael Martin
Australia
"I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible."
- Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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Ewe, don't be a wooly bully. He is not a mutton for punishment just because he phrased it incorrectly. I am not being a bleating heart, just don't want to see you herd him. 
Don't bother, I already got my coat on
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Well... considering that I am not native english speaker...
Shall we try on german or spanish and see how many errors do you have?
I like being corrected and I am thankful for it, but man... you have to take it easy. It is not that I killed someone.
M.D.V.
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Nelek wrote: I like being corrected and I am thankful for it, but man... you have to take it easy. It is not that I killed someone.
You've been around for a few years at least, surely you've noticed my patience or lack there of.
Nelek wrote: Shall we try on german or spanish and see how many errors do you have?
I just get the Mother In-Law for that, fluent to read, write and speak in 6 languages.
Michael Martin
Australia
"I controlled my laughter and simple said "No,I am very busy,so I can't write any code for you". The moment they heard this all the smiling face turned into a sad looking face and one of them farted. So I had to leave the place as soon as possible."
- Mr.Prakash One Fine Saturday. 24/04/2004
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I heard he's not been able to sleep so he's been
counting sheep.
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0
There's a fine line between crazy and free spirited and it's usually a prescription.
I'm currently unsupervised, I know it freaks me out too but the possibilities are endless.
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Corporal Agarn wrote: Sorry I will get my coat.
That coat of yours, hun!
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I was just informed that the company will be picking up my home internet bill.
Elephant elephant elephant, sunshine sunshine sunshine
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Are they providing a 56K MODEM too?
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Nice, since the rest of the announcement is that from now on, you'll all be sharing one cubicle in which the heat and lights will turned on for 1 hour a day. This, they believe, will either increase team cooperation (sharing blankets, body heat, and the single dial-up telephone connection), or encourage telecommuting, either of which is bound to improve the profitability of the company.
Will Rogers never met me.
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Translation: We expect you to be available even when you are not at work. From now on, holidays are work from home days, and sleep is henceforth called on-call.
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 In short, 24/7
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Translation #2:
We pay for the service, thus we own the data that travels over it. We will be snooping on your IP traffic.
We know everything about you. Thank you for your compliance.  Where's the sinister grin icon?
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