|
There's a reason shotguns were invented.
You'll never get very far if all you do is follow instructions.
|
|
|
|
|
chriselst wrote: Is this really where she will be in 4 years time?
I'm terrified.
Well... it's not inevitable, in my opinion.
I'm pretty sure that most young girls learn to act that way through peer pressure. If you can somehow teach her that not all older girls have to act that way, and that she needn't fake interests to fit in with her friends, she'll probably grow into something unique - herself.
I find it hard to believe that all young girls would act in the way you 've described if they never felt the pressure to conform.
|
|
|
|
|
Quote: I find it hard to believe that all young girls would act in the way you 've described if they never felt the pressure to conform. And parenting has the biggest impact on that.
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
|
|
|
|
|
chriselst wrote: tried to select the ones we wanted to take away
chriselst wrote: I was after four of them
Taken out of context, you're one sick b*****d
If your neighbours don't listen to The Ramones, turn it up real loud so they can.
“We didn't have a positive song until we wrote 'Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue!'” ― Dee Dee Ramone
"The Democrats want my guns and the Republicans want my porno mags and I ain't giving up either" - Joey Ramone
|
|
|
|
|
The Paedo hunt club is probably scrutinising this thread as you read.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
|
|
|
|
|
chriselst wrote: a few hundred kids, mostly girls, under the age of 16, quite a few of them barely dressed
Where are the parents when they are going out barely dressed?
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
|
|
|
|
|
|
JimmyRopes wrote: Where are the parents when they are going out barely dressed? Taking care of the grand child?
All that is necessary for Evil to succeed is for Good Folks to keep voting for their Party. - Cornelius Thirp
|
|
|
|
|
Likely they didn't leave the house barely dressed.
The girls I knew had their "going out" clothes stashed at a friend's house, they left home, changed, went out, changed back, came home. Parents were none the wiser, or at least that is what the girls thought.
|
|
|
|
|
RJOberg wrote: The girls I knew had their "going out" clothes stashed at a friend's house, they left home, changed, went out, changed back, came home.
They had to be leaving someone's house barely dressed. Did these parents take responsibility?
Then again they could have changed in a car and not be seen by adults.
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
|
|
|
|
|
Slow reply, was out of town for the weekend.
Responsibility... responsibility? What's that? Nah, the big problem was that there was always that one kid who had parents who didn't seem to care, or let their child make their own choices, or who knows why. And everyone knew which one it was.
You know, that parent who lets their 10-12 year old kid have their friends over and watch R rated movies, telling the kids that it is okay? And then act confused when the other parents call up and are angry about finding out that little Timmy just watched a movie meant for grown ups?
Yeah, those parents.
|
|
|
|
|
RJOberg wrote: Nah, the big problem was that there was always that one kid who had parents who didn't seem to care
The report of my death was an exaggeration - Mark Twain
Simply Elegant Designs JimmyRopes Designs
I'm on-line therefore I am.
JimmyRopes
|
|
|
|
|
Your posted paints a very different picture if not read carefully.
chriselst wrote: Is this really where she will be in 4 years time?
Yes. I am not a parent so there is no way I can understand this. Some may say, I should not even comment on this. Going to nightclubs and having a good fun night is fine. But they must be made aware of what's right and what's wrong in general according to culture at your place. They must also know that Miley Cyrus and likes are not cool. Substance abuse is never good (this is the target audience in drug business, isn't it?). They must also be made aware of security measures and major laws at the place.
|
|
|
|
|
Maybe not. It's not necessarily inevitable. Not all girls are like that.
|
|
|
|
|
Whatever you do, don't turn around twice. I did and my 8 years old daughter is now 22 and getting married in 16 days.
On the plus side she is gainfully employed and he is 2 semesters away from graduating with an engineering degree.
So dance with the 8 year old as often as she wants.
|
|
|
|
|
> I'm terrified.
Good, then you're in the right mindset.
Been there. Done that. Mine's 22 now. It eventually gets better, but for now, grit your teeth.
It is terrifying and there's nothing you can do about it.
People say shotguns help, but they don't.
There's nothing you can do about a teenage girl's life other than
sit there, observe the horror, and wait for the "high drama" moments to subside.
Don't even talk to her when the drama is high. Just make a few notes about what would
be a prudent way to avoid that drama in the future. And run. Run fast!
Talk to her during the lulls. Let her talk first and she will talk a LOT.
You may learn a teeny little thing here or there, but really this is just a way for
her to finally get to the point where she can listen to you.
Then those few notes you made - drop them into the conversations as questions so
they seem like her idea.
Do that over and over again, and eventually your teenage daughter will
become a mature woman and life will =finally= improve for you.
But, in the mean time, grit your teeth. It's not going to be a very fun ride.
Glasses will be thrown. She will have yelling matches with her Mom. Nothing will
be fair. You just don't understand her. Oh my god. Seriously. Dad.
Good luck to ya, my friend.
Eventually, if you're lucky, you get a daughter who knows you "get" her and possibly even a grandkid out of the deal.
As soon as she comes back down, life is wonderful.
(I'm not sayin' all girls are like that, but MINE was.)
|
|
|
|
|
My own daughter turns 12 next week. I empathize with your concerns, and in being terrified
|
|
|
|
|
I think that the quality of Code Project is going down. There are a number of issues that need to be addressed but there is no way that I can click on a link and provide the CP staff with a problem (bug) report. CP also needs a bug report tracker that lets me know what's happening. Let's make CP more professional!
Chris may believe that ads are important. And to some extent I agree. But the large number of ads is disconcerting. Also when ads hide navigation I am even more concerned.
Gus Gustafson
|
|
|
|
|
Let's use the Site Bugs & Suggestions link in the list on the left first. Then we can work on the other stuff.
Will Rogers never met me.
|
|
|
|
|
gggustafson wrote: Chris may believe that ads are important. And to some extent I agree. But the large number of ads is disconcerting. Also when ads hide navigation I am even more concerned.
So, you would be willing to pay a monthly installment to be here?
I could never complain about the existence of advertisements on a totally free site.
I would report if an advertisements is preventing navigating the site. I don't recall ever seeing that happen. I'm running Firefox 28.0. I wonder what browser you are running.
If you see the "Help" menu item above, then click on that and go to "Bugs and suggestions." If that menu is covered by an advertisement, go to http://www.codeproject.com/suggestions.aspx[^]
|
|
|
|
|
It is not a totally free site to me. I hope that I have earned my "free subscription" by my articles and advice.
I am not complaining about ads. I am complaining about their number and their misplacement. What's worse is their inappropriateness. I am an experienced developer. I do not need products that help me develop trivial solutions. I believe that a large number of CP members are the same as me. If CP needs a subscription to eliminate ads from pages that I visit, I might even consider paying for it.
Gus Gustafson
|
|
|
|
|
Bill_Hallahan wrote: So, you would be willing to pay a monthly installment to be here? CP wouldn't exist without its users. CP's users provide content and answer questions. Remove the users and what do you have left?
/ravi
|
|
|
|
|
Ravi Bhavnani wrote: Bill_Hallahan wrote: So, you would be willing to pay a monthly installment to be here? CP wouldn't exist without its users. CP's users provide content and answer questions. Remove the users and what do you have left?
/ravi ravi, the point was made in response to the OP writing:
Chris may believe that ads are important. And to some extent I agree. But the large number of ads is disconcerting.
I expect he did't considered the continuing costs of paying for high bandwidth from an ISP and server costs.
I consider conditions here to be more than equitable. The advertisements never bothered me. And, I hope the people who made this site make a good profit too from advertisers. I can see this took a lot of work.
The article quality varies. Open sites on the Internet are analogous to mining for gold. There's gold, but you have to sift through a lot of dirt to find it. Restricting access to the cognoscenti is neither possible, nor desirable. Good ideas come from all kinds of people with varied levels of expertise.
Sites that do restrict access often have an higher average quality of material, such as sites that publish academic papers, such as the ACM or the IEEE sites, but that comes at the cost of having fewer members and fewer ideas, and also requires a financial price. There are a huge number of practical ideas here that never reach those types of sites.
modified 17-Apr-14 21:15pm.
|
|
|
|
|
The ads don't bother me, either. Sadly, I don't find them useful (appropriate) and have rarely clicked on one.
/ravi
|
|
|
|
|
Hey Gus,
If you see something that's broken please do let us know about it. Each of us, Chris, Sean, Matthew, Kamil and I, and the whole team, really want to know as soon as possible.
I remember a few years ago talking to Chris about 3rd party monitoring services to watch the site and he smiled and said that he would be surprised if an alert came in before he got an email from a member. (fyi we actually have 3 external services and at least 2 internal ones). So please, best is bugs & suggestions which you can see we're very active in:
http://www.codeproject.com/suggestions.aspx[^]
or if you think the site is *really* broken, an email to webmaster@codeproject.com will do the trick.
I do have to say that I'm exceedingly unhappy you feel the quality of the site is going down. We have been working like bandits on new and better features, adding full Git support to articles and allowing them to become full projects along with an amazing developer focused collaborative task management system, and most recently a documentation wiki system for projects.
https://workspaces.codeproject.com[^]
As for advertising, well that's a tricky balance. I can tell you that minimalist is our general approach, but to be useful the ads have to be effective too, and we try incredibly hard to make them relevant and on-topic as well.
Anyway, please do let us know when something is broken, and please understand there are no nefarious intentions. We want to offer an excellent and valuable site to you. Let us know how we can do that better.
David
|
|
|
|